How parents can help change society
Take a look at our jails today. Who are the ones there? Men or women, husbands or wives, they are someone’s son or daughter. They came from a relationship of a man and a woman, who happen to be their mom and dad. Imagine the rapist stalking his next victim, the trigger-happy kid in a high school who out of nowhere shoots himself, the teenage girl who just entered prostitution, the man next door whom your neighbors always considered a gentleman. and suddenly he becomes a murderer, the responsible father and husband who in the shadows is a bank robber. The list goes on. But who are all these criminals? This is someone’s son, this is someone’s daughter.
How can society (you and me) play a role in minimizing or eradicating the ills of society? How can we shape the character of our children so that they will be better citizens tomorrow? Character is a virtue, it is learned, we are not born with it. It is based on motives behind actions towards ourselves, others and the things around us. It is made up of repetitive actions whether good or bad. When we look at our lifestyles today, how much quality time do we spend with our children teaching and mentoring them to develop their character? There is a definite conflict between the demands of work and family. So who has taken on the role of mentor and teacher to our children?
Marlon is 9 years old, the only child of Chantal and Mat. His father is a pediatrician and his mother is a nurse. Both parents work 40 hours a week but with plenty of time during the week to make sure they don’t have to send their son to daycare when he’s not in school. Marlon has all the electronics and toys he ever asked for, including a beautiful laptop he got for his ninth birthday. When Marlon comes home from school, he spends most of his time on his X-box, on the Internet, or watching TV. From time to time, he is outside playing with his friends. Chantal or Mat can be at home but watching television in their room or working in the office in the next room. The day ends and everyone goes to bed. This is the typical life of an urban family. The children are on their own and have been left to three main mentors:
- Media (TV, Internet, Movies, Videogames, CDs,)
- Colleagues
- the indifferent neighbor
The media it is uncensored and provides role models for youth and adults who are into crime, sexuality, drug abuse, and violence. The child is exposed and grows up knowing that this is the norm in society. In order for him or her to be accepted in society, the media has taught the child to behave in a certain way and the child grows up modeling a character in his or her subconscious mind and then in her actions.
Colleagues – Peer teaching takes center stage during times when they are at school and outside with other children. What would a 9 year old teach his age partner?
the indifferent neighbor he sees Marlon practicing some dirty tricks on the corner with another neighbor’s son and comments, “thank God he’s not my son.” What a pity; because this is the same kid who grows up to be the criminal who will either kill this woman’s child or terrorize the neighborhood.
As parents, we must assume the crucial role of mentoring and teaching our children and being our siblings’ keeper, taking care of our neighbor’s child as well. Then what do we do?
- Be the first to teach your child about issues related to social ills – most parents leave this to the teachers. We have to be our children’s first teachers.
- Be present in the environment where your children are; be aware of what they are doing.
- Be sure to do your own censorship for the kinds of shows and movies your child is exposed to.
- Set up a firewall on your child’s computer to protect it from things it shouldn’t be exposed to.
- Get to know your child’s friends.
- Spend quality time with your child.
As we continue in the rat race, relaxing in the comfort of our homes or lavishing our children with gadgets, let’s not forget our social responsibility. Let’s make sure we play our part in our families and in society to make the world a better place.