Chinese Customs in Giving Gifts
Buying a gift isn’t always easy, especially for someone from a different culture. This article provides interesting information if the gift is for a Chinese.
As China is a big place with many provinces, the culture may vary depending on which province a person comes from; but there are some general topics that can be followed to avoid embarrassing situations.
What do you need to know?
For the Chinese, anything that brings prosperity, longevity or good fortune is fine and anything related to or ‘sounds like’ death should be avoided. This rule applies to both numbers and colors that are used on almost any occasion.
Note: The pronunciation refers to Cantonese.
bad numbers – the number 4 is the least welcome number simply because it has a similar pronunciation to ‘death’.
good numbers – number 8 sounds like prosperity and number 9 sounds like longevity. Strings of 8 or 9 like ‘888’, ’99’ are even better. The numbers ‘168’ and ‘138’ are also very popular because they sound like ‘continuing fortune’.
bad colors – Black and white are usually for funerals or mourning. Therefore, you should only send white flowers to a funeral and the wrapping paper should not be black or white.
good colors – red and gold are for celebrations such as birthdays and weddings.
Items to avoid – sharp objects such as knives or scissors, since they would ‘cut’ a relationship. Umbrellas seem separation. The clock chimes like “attending a funeral”. Handkerchiefs are for mourning. The books are not for Cantonese who love gambling because it sounds like “loss”, otherwise it’s fine.
Exceptions: Although dressing in black or white for a wedding is not a tradition, it is acceptable if the wedding ceremony takes place in a Western-style church.
Do not be offended if your hosts do not open the gift in front of you, as it is not polite in Chinese culture unless you insist. Also, they usually don’t accept your gift right away in case you feel they are greedy.
What are the popular items?
Money
Cash can be used on almost all occasions. For happy occasions, it should be placed inside a ‘red envelope’ that has some words of blessing pre-printed on it. Red envelopes can be easily found in most Chinese grocery stores; Always check with the staff to find one for the occasion you want if you don’t understand the Chinese characters on the envelope, otherwise you might give one away for the wrong occasion.
The amount inside the envelope must follow the numbering rules mentioned above, that is, use even numbers except number 4. Also, if you are a couple, you must give two envelopes instead of one to cover both.
If used at a funeral, which is normally used to donate to charity or help grieving family financially, you can put a small amount of cash in an ‘odd’ number in a regular ‘white envelope’.
food
There is no doubt that the Chinese love food, this is always a good bet especially for the elderly. When visiting someone in person, it’s always a good way to bring a food basket containing fruit, cookies, or a good table wine. If he or she is a smoker then a good brand of cigarette is fine too. In the high range you can give away food such as dried oysters, dried shellfish, mushrooms or bird’s nests. For individual fruits like oranges or apples, count them in even numbers, such as 6, 8, or 10 pieces.
jewelry gold ornament
It is usually given at large celebrations such as weddings, newborns, 21st birthdays, 60th birthdays, 90th birthdays, etc.
Baby: Parents like to organize a banquet for their newborn baby after one month of birth. A jade, gold or silver bracelet or necklace is a good gift, otherwise baby clothes.
Birthday: If you know the person’s Chinese zodiac sign, another attractive item is a gold-plated Chinese zodiac figurine representing the person’s animal sign.
Wedding: jade or gold bracelet or necklace resembles a long-lasting relationship.
What kind of gifts for the holidays?
There are many festivals in China, but you will most likely be invited to join a family celebration at the following festivals:
Spring Festival (Chinese New Year) – This is the most important festival for the Chinese people who gather family, friends and relatives. It is customary to give money in a red packet from a married couple to unmarried people or children. If you are single, it is considered good manners to bring a food/fruit basket to your hosts.
Mid-Autumn Festival (Moon) – This is the day when people would sit with family and friends to see the full moon and serve moon cakes and other food. Therefore, bringing some mooncakes or food to your hosts is the best gift you can offer.
Dragon Boat Festival – During this festival, bag-sized packets of rice are made to honor a patriotic scholar named Chu Yuan who drowned himself to protest against the emperor. Before he recovered his body, people made rice packets and threw them into the water to prevent any fish from eating it fresh. Another saying is that dragon boats were used to drive away ‘water spirits’ because the dragon is the God of the oceans. Rice packets are made of sticky rice, pork and egg yolk wrapped in bamboo leaves and are sold in most shops during the festival.
If you’re interested in cooking, bring a few packets of homemade rice that is sure to impress your hosts.
Other ocasions
Returning from vacation: small souvenirs for your neighbors, friends, colleagues and relatives when returning from a trip.
Farewell: cash in a red packet or a small gift, such as a sailboat, which means smooth sailing to the new destination.
Visiting someone at home – food basket.
Visiting someone in the hospital: healthy food and drinks (eg Ginseng) that will help a speedy recovery.
Conclusion
Generally speaking, dealing with people from a difficult culture requires understanding. Some of the traditions have been practiced for a long time but are declining in the new generations. The Chinese are normally understandable in terms of cultural conflict as they have over 2000 years of history and have a different culture from a different province. It is beneficial to know the customs, but it is not necessary to follow them strictly, as long as you stay away from the business of ‘death’, you should be safe.